A mother’s intuition. We’ve all heard the saying, but until you are actually a parent, you don’t realize the true weight of the truth 3 little words carry. I always felt like I had good intuition about people. I think it was more so a feeling of dread or uneasiness about people that were different than myself. And by different I mean their values – what’s right and what’s wrong. (Ahem – refer back to the previous posting about judgement). Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve made bad judgement calls before – but in the grand scheme I feel like my intuition is pretty sound.
Then onto motherhood, where your judgement and intuition about other people in relation to your own child
doubles multiplies times infinity. Suddenly we become aware of every movement, statement, action, reaction of anyone who is anywhere near our precious bundle of joy. You’ve got a weird walk and a creepy gaze? Back the &$#% off and don’t even look at my kid on your way. The need to protect also multiplies to infinity. I don’t know about other mama’s out there, but it hit me by surprise how intense this feeling of intuition gets as soon as you realize you are pregnant even.
Good intuition is a natural response when your main purpose in life suddenly becomes protecting and nurturing another person who is incapable of judging for themselves. And as the Mama we do know (mostly) what is best for our child. We are raising them a certain way and we’d like the people and situations they encounter to aid in that positive growth.
Intuition goes array when your own dislike towards another person turns into the uncontrollable urge to jab a pencil in their eye anytime they look your child’s direction or say a simple “hi” to them on their way through. With “stop pretending like you know my kid” passing through your gritted teeth at a low grumble.
As a result your children pick up on both ends – they’ll be surrounded by people and situations that help them grow, and they’ll pick up on your disdain for the people you personally don’t like and probably learn that trait as well. Well, crap. Guess there’s not an easy way around that one…hindsight is always 20/20, right?
I personally haven’t mastered the ability to be nice to everyone in order to be a better influence on J…if anyone out there has figured that one out, you really should write a book. It’s kinda like a mama bear protecting her cubs – like we literally become the bear…and just want to maul anyone or anything that hurts them…or could possibly hurt them…or might have the potential to someday hurt them.
For now, I’ll keep trusting my judgement and intuition. If I don’t like something/someone and it gives me a feeling of uneasiness, then I’ll do my darndest to keep J from interacting with that thing/person. Hopefully my mama intuition won’t lead me astray. So far, so good 🙂